Throwback Thursday

I came across this newspaper photo of me when I was going through a box of stuff that my ex brought me over Christmas. Even the reason I was in jail makes me laugh now because it was something stupid that could have been completely avoided if I'd have just kept my mouth shut and controlled my emotions. But in the moment, I felt I needed to say what was on my mind and that feeling ended up landing me in jail for a few days. It's crazy that cussing someone out over the phone would be considered a crime just like assault or violating a protective order. But that's our criminal justice system. You can tell how irritated I was from my face in the picture. I was completely irritated and just not feeling the whole process.

But that's old news. I'm glad I'm past that part of my life, feeling the need to speak out on every little thing that I feel wronged about. When things bother me or upset me now I just leave it alone. Not everything deserves a response and most times it's not even worthy of my attention. I'm in a much better place now and I'm grateful for that. But today was just an opportunity for me to take a look at my past and see how far I've come. The old Bennaire has been changed into a new guy who is trying really hard to make life the best it can be. I'm checking my attitude and I'm controlling my mouth. I'm not allowing other people to get me out of my box and I'm holding myself accountable for what I do and what I say. Hopefully there will be no more mugshots of me in the future, I've taken more than enough already.

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The Journal of an Angry Black Man

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