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A Scare With Seti

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Another School Shooting

What kind of world do we live in? What kind of madness are we willing to continue accepting as a nation? It's crazy to watch these school shootings happen again and again and our leaders just sit by and do nothing to deal with the problem. Some people think it's a gun control issue. Others feel it's something that we need to address with more mental health focus. Either way, we really need to come together and have meaningful discussions about the horrible events that continue happening to our children while at school.

When I was young, I never had to worry about being shot at school. School was always a safe place, where I felt encouraged and where I could enjoy spending time with  my friends and learning things that would help me later in life. I never had to worry about someone coming in with a weapon and harming me, my friends, or my teachers. What has changed? What has made people feel like schools are an easy target for mayhem and evil? It's really sad to think t…

I love the Obamas!

I had a fucking seizure!

Tuesday night I had a seizure. It was crazy! It scared the hell out of me. I've never had one before and it was just something that seemingly came out of nowhere. I was with a friend when it happened and I'm so thankful for his quick response in coming to my aid. I have an appointment with my doctor on Monday but I kinda regret not going to the hospital right after it happened. I don't wanna make a big deal about it but I guess I have to, because it is something serious. I just wonder what doctors can do for me now that it's over. I assume they have tests they can do but I am also not really happy about having to explain my recent activities or drug us. I just don't wanna be judged. But in order for them to help me I know that I have to be completely honest with them about the types of things I might be doing that could be putting me in danger of having another one. I've witnessed other people have seizures before and it's scary just being around someone wh…

5 Things I'm Proud Of...

My bro suggested this writing prompt to me last night, so let me give it a try.

I'm proud of the fact that I graduated from college. It was a struggle and I really didn't have anyone to go before me to set the stage, but though it all I stuck to it and accomplished my goal. My degree proudly hangs in my aunt's house and I have a copy in my room to remind me of what I've done. It was one of my proudest moments even though I didn't get to attend my own graduation (another story).

I'm proud of how I'm dealing with my mental issues. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder years ago and it's been a struggle to cope with the ways my emotions and my mood changes. For the past year or two I've done well though. It's not an easy fight but I'm committed to beating this thing and not allowing it to ruin my life or my relationships.

I'm proud of myself for starting a fledgling business. It's only a resume writing business but it's something th…

Dating App Drama

I don't know why I don't just give these things up completely. Days like today make me wonder if they are even giving me a decent outlet to talk to other gay men, or if they are just a way for bitter faggots to spew hatred when they don't get the type of response they want from me. It's like I try to be nice to everyone, but people assume I'm supposed to be a certain way. And when I'm not who they think I should be, they get an attitude or they get dismissive.

The first idiot today really threw me for a loop. He hit me up and his profile was one that I wouldn't have given the time of day, but he went against his own words and sent me a pic early in the conversation, saying he wanted me to know who I was talking to. So I figured he was at least half way decent if he could understand that I didn't want to talk to an anonymous profile. So we chatted briefly and he soon asked me for my number. I thought he wanted to ask me something personal but it turns ou…

Gratitude Journal

What am I grateful for today?

I am grateful for a comfortable home. We're not rich but we're far from poor too. I've always felt like home was a place I was always welcome and where I can be myself.

I'm grateful for those friends I have who support me financially. They definitely don't have to do it and I appreciate the help they give when they are able to.

I am grateful for the luxuries of cable and internet because they keep me from being bored and they allow me to do a little bit of work for myself from home.

I'm grateful for the books I have because they've taught me a lot about things that I'm interested in, particularly history and politics.

I'm grateful for my experiences growing up, because they have taught me to be appreciative of the life that I have.