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A Rainy Monday

Mondays typically suck for people who have to return to work after the weekend. For me, it's just another day in the unending series of days of my life. Not necessarily good or bad, just what it is. Today it's been raining all day, I guess it's been raining since last night actually. And it's a bit colder than it's been here over the last week or so. But it's that time for the temperature to drop and for people to get out their coats and hats and gloves.

Rainy days can be a bit depressing for me sometimes, but today hasn't been that bad at all. I took my usual walk to the store for a black and some blunts, just to get out the house. I smoked my black on the walk back to the crib, but I haven't rolled up or stepped outside to get high because who really wants to stand outside in the cold and rain to get high? Not me.

It's 5:00 and I know Mr. is getting off work right about now. I really miss seeing his smile when he walks through the door. But thank god for technology, we text and talk and send pics back and forth all the time so I'm not missing him as much as I would be if we didn't have those things to keep us connected. Still can't wait til December so I can go visit and spend some real quality time with my husband again.

I really don't have much to say, just kinda wanted to write a little something about this rainy Monday.


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Can you believe that I still dream of getting high
Even after being here for 85 days
In my sleep I buy a dime, and roll up a blunt
And smoke and try to wake up still John Blazed
But it isn't just weed that my mind craves anymore
It's the process and the act of getting high
Because it gives me the chance, to leave reality behind
And just float, like a cloud up into the night sky
I'm a drug addict, and it's not easy to admit
But being real is my best shot at escaping death
I've smoked tons of weed, snorted likes of coke
But I fucked up when I shot up with meth
We've all heard this saying, at some point in our lives
"What's good to you ain't always good for you"
Well that shit felt too great, and I knew it was no good
Because it took days before my body recovered
I'm not proud of that shit, but I live in my truth
And maybe I can help someone else avoid it
Because depression is a lie, and when you think you've lost your mind
All that'…