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31!


Today is my 31st birthday.  And even though I felt that I wasn't going to welcome it as I have others ages along my journey, but the truth is I'm very happy. I'm happy to know that there are people out there who love me enough to remember and send me well wishes on today.  I'm happy to know that I haven't spent my whole life doing nothing, or wasting time. I might not be where I thought I'd be at this time when I was a kid, but I'm definitely not doing too bad either.  There are some things that I can improve on, but I think that anyone who lives another day, could say the same about themselves and their lives.  Things might not be perfect right now, but I have so much to live for and to look forward to.

I just wanted to take a moment and thank God for showing me His grace and mercy in allowing me to see this day.  There could have been so many situations and so many times where my life could have been lost, but I'm here.  There could have been so many obstacles that pushed me toward destruction, but there weren't.  I've never been homeless. I've never been hungry for long enough than it takes to get to a restaurant or grocery store.  I've never been abused. I've made mistakes and not-so-great decisions, but they all came with a lesson and for a purpose. For all of that, I am grateful.


As I go forward after today, I don't know what's going to be much different than days before.  I'm sure my faults will still bother me more than they bother other people. I'm sure that I'll still probably smoke a little bit too much as well. But, with every day that passes I know that I become wiser, stronger and a better person overall. I want to grow as a man, a brother, a son, a father and a husband.  I want to take control of my life more, not just ride the tide that was set for me by someone else.  I want today to be the beginning of whatever transformation my 30's has in store for me. I welcome it.

Thanks to everyone who sent well wishes, gifts, and kind words already. It's been a great morning so far and I'm sure the rest of the day has only good things in waiting as well.


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"Better You Than Me"

Maybe you can help me better understand
Why you act like a little boy and not a grown ass man
You try to run the TV, all day stuck on BOUNCE
And you're a fiend for the coffee, always begging for an ounce
You've claimed more than once all you do is "get money"
But I see you in here with nothing, so something is funny
At the top of your lungs you holler and yell
But make an excuse for your behavior, saying "This is jail."
You've got 6 kids, and 4 baby mamas
But you beg me for a click so you can call and cause drama.
You claim to be hard, snatching ass every day
But you expect me to be polite in all that I say
You're on your way back to prison and it's so sad to see
But I'd rather it be you going up the road than me.