Skip to main content

Why am I alive?

(This is a writing assignment my case manager gave me after one of our regular meetings. I know he's trying to challenge me on my perception of myself. I was hesitant to even participate but once I gave it a shot I saw how much I got out of it than I believed I would initially.)




Well, the easiest answer to that is because Bennie and Patricia met, fell in love and had me. But, I’m sure there are plenty more reasons that answer the question why I’m STILL ALIVE.  Those, I believe, are more important…

I’m alive because my birth mother and father loved me enough to allow someone else to give me the life they felt they wouldn’t be able to.

I’m alive because I have an aunt and uncle who loved me enough to feed me and keep me healthy and happy.

I’m alive because at some point I learned to love myself enough to do what I knew would keep me healthy and happy.

I’m alive because at some point I began to love the things that life brings, the friends, experiences, road trips, etc. And I thrived on wanting to know what new thing was around the next bend or corner or door.

I’m alive, as I’ve learned in my study of History, because of ancestors who braved unthinkable conditions and treatment from the Middle Passage through the pain and humiliation of slavery at places like Middle Plantation.

I’m alive because of maids and cooks like my grandmothers, who kept their mouths shut in order to help make a living and care for children that they prayed would never have to face the same injustices in the world.

I’m alive because I have something outside of just myself to live for.  I have family and friends who would be deeply hurt if something were to happen to me. And if, at times, I find myself not so sure about whether or not to continue living I know I can be sure that their answer to that question will always and forever be “Yes.”

I’m alive because I have a man who loves me enough to look past my mistakes and bad choices, past my lies and half-truths, and is still able to love whatever he sees that’s left over.  He’s picked me up when I was lower than dirt and has kept me by his side in every moment whether I wanted it that way or not.  He’s kept faith in me when I’d given up and he continues to be my biggest fan in a sea of people that I don’t always have the guts to trust.

I’m alive because something deep down in me won’t allow me to give up. Believe me, there are days when I feel like throwing in every towel I can get my hands on. But for some reason, maybe a few hours or days or even weeks later, that spirit of giving up isn’t as vocal anymore and that other voice comes back just loud enough to get me off my ass and at it again.

I’m alive because crack couldn’t kill me as a baby, and because drugs aren’t stronger than my spirit even now.

I’m alive because The Almighty saw that my Aunt Bert deserved a son, and whether I see myself as a good son or not, I’m special to her and I give her life something that she gets from no one else.

I’m alive because I didn’t think HIV was a death sentence back in 2005, and I still don’t think it is today.  I made up in my mind back then that I still had things to do, and I’ve accomplished many of those things if I give myself the freedom to look back objectively.  I accepted what I needed to do, and I was determined to do it all. And I did.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Living At Home...

Why are gay men so mean when it comes to how they feel about people living at home with their parents? I mean, I shouldn't care what folk say but sometimes it does bother me. These people hit me up for whatever reason but soon turn sour when they realize I can't host or don't have my own car. I understand that people who have their own work hard for it but that doesn't give you the right to put other people down because they are not where you are exactly at this point in life. In my situation, it upsets me that people just assume I'm a bum, and they don't care to even know what things happened in my life that led me to have to be at home right now. They don't care. It's just fucked up how people are so materialistic and shallow. Of course I would rather have my own place and my own car but that's just not in the cards for me at this point. I've had those things before and I know the work involved in having them. But not having them doesn't ...

A Weekend Renewal

Shalom House, Montpelier, VA This weekend I had the wonderful opportunity to attend a "Transformation Retreat." It was a weekend getaway for persons infected with HIV, and part of a series of other retreats and programs by The Renewal Projects, an organization in Richmond, VA. The experience was amazing, unforgettable, life-changing, and any other word you could think of to describe a simply beautiful weekend. We didn't have a large group, which at first seemed to be a bit of a bummer. But, it turned out to be the thing that made the experience that much better for myself, and I hope for the rest of the people who attended. My room during the retreat There were no televisions or radios. Our rooms were simple. The only lights outside were those lining the sidewalk from the two cabins we stayed in down to the "Shalom House" where we had our group meetings and activities, as well as our meals. The food was great, too! We practiced meditation a...

A little bit of happy.

Anyone who knows me or follows my blog knows that I have dealt with depression and mood swings that are not always be easiest things to cope with throughout my adult life. Today, I'm at a place where I can genuinely and sincerely say that I have been feeling happy a lot recently. Not much has changed in my situation. I'm still living at home. I'm still unemployed and on disability. I'm still single and not in any type of serious intimate relationship (at least not anything exclusive). But for some reason, I've been feeling happy. I don't know what has changed in my mental state, or if I'm just allowing myself to let go of all the negative and be content with what I have right now, but whatever it is that has me feeling a little more upbeat I'm definitely here for it. I still spend a lot of time in my room, downloading "movies" and being on social media. Some might say that's unhealthy, but I get a lot of interaction from my friends and fa...